Leads.

In a previous life I was privileged to enjoy the opportunity of observing real office life firsthand. This is a slightly strange experience for many reasons: the sudden insatiable thirst quenched only by copious quantities of cooled water that gurgles as it is dispensed; mysterious oscillations in the rate of time's passage; the exorbitant cost of not even mediocre sandwiches. Strangest, however, is the language, and one term that I heard often in that time was 'lead-gen'.

Lead-generation (to give the above its full airing) is - as far as I could tell - the process by which an introduction is developed into a marketing campaign, and hopefully a sale. As alien as this idea was to me in my naivety I have now realised that lead-generation is a more than useful skill, indeed a necessary one, in the pursuit of gainful employment. I have practiced this technique now on the multifaceted job-market of London Town, with varying degrees of intensity, for approximately two months and finally am able to report that at least two leads have been generated - Hoorah.

In The 40 Year-Old Virgin Seth Rogen's character observes:

'See back when I was growing pot I realised that the more seeds that I planted the more pot I could ultimately smoke'. You see we're all at it: Lead Generation, beautiful.

Anyway, hopeful something meaningful now comes from at least one of these saplings if only so as to free me from the (admittedly self imposed) obligation of recording my search for my fortune.

Thanks for reading.

p.s - If you dislike my style and feel that there are too many commas, dashes and brackets then I apologise (but at the same time I urge you to acknowledge that I resisted the urge to describe Rogen, above, as indulging in 'Weed-Generation'). Frankly I love parentheses like the Pope hates condoms and I don't think either of us will change our views in the near future (for the record that is not too blue, condoms are an entirely necessary part of life and indispensable protectors of lives - I am not responsible for their existence).